ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
