So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
