Did you just see the Batmobile???
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
