Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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