Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
