This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
