He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Randomize
