he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Randomize
