I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
