I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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