so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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