I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize