just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
