The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize