I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
