we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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