I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
