I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Do you remember whose house we're in?
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
