just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Text me some of your sweat
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
