How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
