mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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