Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
