i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
