I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
you told grandpa to call you daddy
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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