I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
