She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
