If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
