So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
