Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I FOUND THE LEGS
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
