The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
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