Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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