let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
