using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
