I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
