Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
