So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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