I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
