What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize