is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize