And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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