it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
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