if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
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