Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
