Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
