if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
