He is such a slut. More and more my type.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
its liver damage thursday
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
