I want to make a zoo with you.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
