Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
