Your mouth is God's brothel.
You can't motorboat a personality
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Randomize
