Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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